Top Ten
Things I Won’t Be Doing on My Sabbatical, But Wish I Were
1. Making a livable wage…or at least a teacher's salary
2. Absolutely nothing, while ghost bloggers make me look good
3. Fighting off the boozy attention of unnamed first spouse at Chelsea Clinton wedding
4. Patenting my Gulf-oil spill contraption, while Costner brags on his bike
1. Making a livable wage…or at least a teacher's salary
2. Absolutely nothing, while ghost bloggers make me look good
3. Fighting off the boozy attention of unnamed first spouse at Chelsea Clinton wedding
4. Patenting my Gulf-oil spill contraption, while Costner brags on his bike
5. Gobbling up my grandchildren (sorry, girls, but at least this isn't as annoying as when you were teenagers)
6. Gobbling up someone else's grandchildren
7. Marrying Jon Stewart (sorry, Julius, but at least this isn’t as annoying as when we were teenagers...)
8. Sheltering the ill-gotten gains of my Ponzi scheme
9. Using the hysterically-radical gains of my Jon Stewart spinoff to "Billgates" the world
l0. Establishing the post-Kagan Giardina Court precedent: “Stare this, Kimosabe!!”
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